A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and said to the shopkeeper, "I'll have an AutoCAD monkey please." The shopkeeper nodded, went over to a cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fitted a collar and leash, handed it to the customer, saying, "That'll be $5000." The customer paid and walked out with his monkey. 

Startled, the tourist went over to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey. Most of them are only few hundred Dollars. Why did that one cost so much?" 

The Shopkeeper answered, "Ah, that monkey can draw in AutoCAD - very fast, clear layouts, no mistakes, well worth the money." 
The tourist looked at a monkey in another cage. "That one's even more expensive! $10,000! What does it do?"

"Oh, that one's a Design monkey; it can design systems, layout projects, mark-up drawings, write specifications, some even calculate. All the really useful stuff," said the shopkeeper.

The tourist looked around for a little longer and saw a third monkey in its own cage. The price tag around its neck read $50,000. He gasped to the shopkeeper, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?" 

The shopkeeper replied, "Well, I haven't actually seen it do anything, but it says it's an Engineer." 

Q:  When does a person decide to become an Engineer?
A:  When they realize they don't have the charisma to become an undertaker.
  
Q:  What do Engineers use for birth control?
A:  Their personalities.

Q:  How can you tell an extroverted Engineer?
A:  When he talks to you, he looks at your shoes instead of his own.
  
Q:  Why did the Engineer cross the road?
A:  Because they looked in the file and that's what they did last year.

Q:  How do you drive an Engineer crazy?
A:  Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him, and fold a road map the wrong way.